Today's Love Tip
If you've just had a baby, then sex probably isn't the first thought on your mind. In fact, it's probably not even on your list of things to do anytime in the near future. But for your partner, when you can resume having sex may be at the... Read More
More Love Advice
4 Ways How to Get Over a Breakup and Fast
Breaking up is hard to do. It can be hard even if you are the initiator or if you are the one being dumped. Why are they so hard? First, if you are the one being dumped, the pain you feel can be enormous. Second, if you are the initiator, it's the feeling of change that can be hard to deal with. Suddenly being alone can be difficult to deal with; leaving some to feel it will never end... the loneliness.

However, there is hope because there are ways to reduce the suffering you are feeling, allowing you to move on with life. So how do you get over a break up? There are 4 steps to help you recover.{relatedarticles}

Step (1) Be Patient -

Have you ever heard the patience is a virtue? Well, when you are dealing with a break up this is true. You should have patience with the feelings you have, your grief and the pain. If you want, scream, cry, pitch a fit, do what you must. However, don't think for one minute those feelings will last. Have patience that it will pass.


As time passes, you may realize that the pain, hurt and anger are gone. This allows you to face life without past baggage. In saying that, don't rush right into a relationship after you discovered your pain has vanished. Instead, wait to find someone special and have patience that it will happen.

Step (2) Be Flexible -

Have you ever faced this scenario before: It's a Monday and you've been asked by friends to go out on Friday evening? You plan all week for it and then Friday comes around, you just don't feel like going out. Try to make plans flexible. If you can listen to what your emotions and body are telling you. Be patient in that when you are ready, you'll get out more. A good exercise to help heal the pain is writing. Place all your emotions and feelings there.{relatedarticles}

Step (3) Give It Time -

Remember to give yourself time to get over your break up. Some friends may tell you get out and go mingle. However, what's actually best is to grief, cry, and be sad or angry. Feel these emotions to work through the moods. You should be out of the funk within two weeks. If it goes past that, talk with your physician about it. You could be suffering from depression. Try talking with someone who cares for you too. It helps too!


Step (4) Have Faith -

Remember that the feelings you have now do not last. You will smile again where you cry now. You'll find someone who will make you get over you ex and make you wonder why you even cried over them in the first place. What do you need to have? Have a little faith, that is.{relatedarticles}

About The Author

For more information, visit http://www.forgetex.com Don't waste any more time crying for your ex, it is important for you to move on when the relationship is over. Apply these simple techniques and get tremendous results you will never feel the urge to contact your ex, remember the pain or feel unworthy anymore when you visit www.ForgetEx.com.

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Do You Need a Sex Surrogate?

Have problems in bed? A poor body image? Trouble talking to or approaching women? Premature ejaculation? Then you may want to consider a sex surrogate. Sexual surrogacy is a unique type of therapy designed to placate sexual and social anxiety and treat patients with sexual issues and dysfunctions.

A surrogate is almost like a sexual or social stand-in. Through socialization, as well as sexual and physical contact, a surrogate can help patients treat underlying issues. According to the International Professional Surrogates Association, the work of a surrogate is "designed to build client self-awareness and skills in the areas of physical and emotional intimacy. {relatedarticles}

Each program is designed to increase the client's knowledge, skills, and comfort. As the days pass, clients find themselves becoming more relaxed, more open to feelings, and more comfortable with physical and emotional intimacy." Sex surrogates often treat patients through a combination of talking, touching, physical contact and even intercourse.


A sex surrogate can be helpful in treating a number of sexual problems, including:

  • premature ejaculation - the inability of a man to delay ejaculation or ejaculate at the appropriate time;
  • erectile dysfunction - problems achieving an erection in sexual situations;
  • problems with orgasms - either the inability to have them or a dissatisfaction with the current level of orgasms;
  • fear of intimacy - anxiety related to physical contact or emotional closeness;
  • sexual shame - feeling guilty or shameful for having sexual desires or experiences;
  • self-confidence issues - having low confidence or a negative image of oneself;
  • fear because of sexual abuse or trauma - this could be because of rape, incest, etc.;
  • sexual orientation issues - confusion about one's sexual orientation or leaning;
  • issues with sexual appetite - the lack of or a low level of sexual desire ;
  • social anxiety - trouble interacting with people, socializing and more;
  • lack of experience - especially in the case of a virgins; and
  • lubrication issues - the inability to become properly lubricated before or during sex.

Essentially, you see a sex surrogate like you would a therapist. Typical sessions will begin with you and your surrogate talking about your sexual issues and anxieties. Unlike a typical therapist, however, a sex surrogate will be more "hands on" in their approach to your treatment. Sex surrogates use sexual encounters and physical interactions to treat their patients.{relatedarticles}

According to a New York Magazine article, Rita Bell, a New York sex surrogate, regularly uses massages, sensual touching, bubble baths, massages and intercourse to help her patients attack their issues, although not all patients' treatments require full-on intercourse. "There is no sex just for the sake of having sex. It's about solving the problem," Rita says.


Through physical encounters, sex surrogates can help patients build sexual skills, a healthy body image and an improved comfort level with intimacy. Continued treatment with a sex surrogate can also help patients learn to develop healthy ongoing relationships and proper social skills.

Sex surrogates don't just provide sex. According to a 1983 study of surrogates by Dr. Raymond J. Noonan, 48% of a surrogate's time is spent on non-sexual exercises and experiences.{relatedarticles}

The study also showed that surrogates spent 34% of the time talking with their patients and another 4.5% teaching them social skills, often in public settings. Only 13% of a surrogate's time goes toward sexual encounters, according to the study, and most of these are toward the end of the patient's treatment program.

In addition to helping patients cope with definitively sexual problems, sex surrogates often work with patients on their communication skills, emotional attachment issues and even their hygiene, with the ultimate goal of helping the patient become a more sexually and socially healthy person.

According to sex surrogate Lisa Carr on CarnalNation.com, surrogacy "aims to enrich the client's world sensually and emotionally as well as erotically."


Sexual surrogacy was developed in 1970 by sex researchers William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson. Masters and Johnson conducted an 11-year study in which female volunteers provided hands-on treatments for sexual problems and issues. The study followed the treatment of 510 married couples, 54 single men and 3 single women.

Masters and Johnson saw a staggering 75% success rate with the single men in the study. The full results of the study and the pair's idea for a sex surrogacy treatment program were released in the book Human Sexual Inadequacy.{relatedarticles}

If you have issues with intimacy, lack sexual experience or have social or sexual anxieties, treatment with a sex surrogate may be able to help you conquer your problems. Not only can a sex surrogate give you help in treating the physical aspects of your issues, but they can help you develop better communication skills and improved self-confidence.

Before considering a sex surrogate, ensure you have the funds to back it up. According to sex surrogate Lisa Carr, the typical cost for sexual surrogacy treatment is pretty expensive, coming in at about $2,500. Health insurance usually will not cover any part of it.

Sexual surrogacy is also fairly unorthodox treatment, so there may not be a sex surrogate in your immediate area. You may need to budget for travel expenses, lodging and more for your treatment.


Sex surrogates have seen success in treating men and women of all ages, races and sizes, and they could help you. But remember, a sexual surrogate is not just there for sexual encounters.

Be prepared to have open and honest conversations about your problems, sexual history and intimacy issues. You will also need to disclose your medical history as well as any medications you are currently on, as these could be effecting your sexual health.{relatedarticles}

There is no tried and true way to determine whether you need a sex surrogate or not. If you are willing to put in the time, effort and hard work that therapy with a sex surrogate will require, it may be a beneficial treatment for you to seek.

A sex surrogate can help you tackle sexual and social issues, as well as enhance your social, communication and relationship-building skills, thus improving your overall quality of life.


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Relationship Lies that are OK to Tell

One out of three conversations between non-married couples contains a lie, according to psychologist Bella DePaulo, and one out of every 10 conversations between married couples contains a lie.

How many do you tell in your relationship?

Lying is something everyone does, and it's not always wrong. Serious lies that betray someone's trust are not OK, and no one should tell those. But white lies are perfectly OK in a relationship and can even be good for it.{relatedarticles}

White lies help save your partner from hurt feelings, preserve the integrity of the relationship and keep you sane, so you don't have to deal with every little situation that could potentially end in an argument.

So which relationship lies are OK to tell?


Relationship Lie #1: Sex is always amazing with you!

While it may not be as amazing as you are saying, it's important to tell him this so he can feel as though he has the power to make your toes curl. It will boost his self-confidence and actually improve your sex life. When someone believes they are competent in something, they will be, and that is how it ends up benefiting you.

Relationship Lie #2: I'll pay for dinner tonight. I don't mind.

Offering to pay for dinner sometimes, even though you believe he should treat you, tells him that you appreciate it when he does pay for you. And it's likely he'll pay for the dinner anyway because he wants to prove he can pay for it and take care of you.{relatedarticles}

Relationship Lie #3: I love this shirt you bought me!

Would it be better if you told him the shirt is ugly? No, it would be rude. You don't want to hurt his feelings and you don't want to seem ungrateful, so telling him you love it is an OK relationship lie to tell.


Relationship Lie #4: We're going to visit your parents this weekend? I can't wait!

When you come between him and his family, he may resent you. Don't ruin your relationship because of his family. Telling him you enjoy spending time with his family and just biting your tongue the whole time is a perfectly good lie to tell in a relationship.

Relationship Lie #5: My parents love you!

So maybe your dad thinks he's a loser, and your mom thinks he's unattractive, but you couldn't tell your partner that. Instead, you tell him a lie so a civil war doesn't break out between him and your parents.{relatedarticles}

Relationship Lie #6: I agree with you completely.

When you disagree with him, it often turns into an argument, right? Some days you just don't have the strength or it's just not worth your time. By agreeing with him, you save yourself from having to explain why you feel different and stop him from trying to convince you of his beliefs.

Relationship Lie #7: You are better than my ex in every way.

Men have insecurities as much as women do, and this is particularly true when it comes to ex-boyfriends. To help him feel better about himself, tell him he is much better than your ex, even if you don't necessarily feel that way.


Relationship Lie #8: My favorite shirt you got me ripped, so I had to throw it out.

The truth may be that you think it's ugly, and you won't ever wear it, so there's no sense in keeping it in your closet. Telling him that you threw it away because you didn't like it would hurt his feelings. However, telling him it ripped or was stained beyond repair gives you a perfectly good reason to throw it out without damaging his self-esteem.

Relationship Lie #9: That shirt is so sexy. Wear it only for me.

The truth is it looks like something your grandpa would wear, and you don't want him leaving the house in it. Instead of telling him he looks ridiculous, you make him feel good about himself and still keep him from leaving the house in it.{relatedarticles}

Relationship Lie #10: Do these pants make my butt look big? You can tell me; I won't get mad.

This lie is only OK to tell if you don't get mad at him. While you may not like the answer, if he says that it dos make your butt look big, you cannot express anger over his answer.

If you can't control your reaction when he says that you don't quite look the way you would like to look, it's better not to tell this lie.


Keep in mind that many men know that when a woman says she won't get mad, she's lying and will get upset. So men who realize this will lie right back with, "It's fantastic on you!" -- even if it does make you look big.

How to Decide if a Relationship Lie Is OK

Before you tell a lie, think about how it will affect your man. Answer the following questions to decide if it's OK.

  1. Will the lie make your man happy, feel empowered or more in love with you?
  2. If he found out the truth, would it be something he would break up with you over?
  3. Are you lying about something morally wrong?
  4. Will your lie betray him?
  5. Is your justification of the lie in his best interest?

If you can answer these questions with a clear conscience that your white lie won't hurt him or the relationship, the lie is most likely OK to tell.{relatedarticles}

What to Do if Caught in the Lie

Sometimes people who tell white lies get caught. When this happens, the best thing to do is to come clean. Don't try to come up with another lie to cover up your initial lie. Remember the phrase, "Oh, the tangled web we weave."

Tell him that you told the lie because you didn't want to hurt him with the truth. You love him too much to see him upset, especially when the cause is you.

He may still be upset, but if you show that you only meant to be loyal and supportive, he will come around to see you only wanted the best for him because you love him.


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